Omg! Still! no! baby!

Greetings from 4am! I hope everyone is still sleeping out there. I am still at home. I am still pregnant. And I am still in labor. If that is even what this is. I thought regular contractions were some sort of signal that labor had begun, but apparently this kid is playing a trick on me. I started timing them yesterday afternoon/evening right before Steve got home and up until 11pm. They were about five minutes apart and lasting 45 seconds each. I thought this was a good sign, and figured they would pick up shortly. Second Baby's telepathic powers must have gotten in my brain, heard that, and decided to screw with me. So while the contractions weren't getting any longer or shorter, I decided that maybe going to bed would let me know if this was "it" or not. Plus I was really tired. Because my bedtime is usually AT LEAST two hours prior. Because we are old fuddy duddies like that.

And whaddaya know. I put on Hypnobabies and konked out. Until just recently, that is. I turned over and realized that my Hypnobabies was done playing through and then I started feeling the contractions again, and I already have a difficult enough time going back to sleep when there AREN'T any contractions involved, so instead of keeping Steve up with my constant shifting and moving, I came downstairs to distract myself and time a few. SURELY they are closer together now and longer, because they were definitely feeling more intense upstairs! But no! Haha! They are longer, but more spaced out than before! WTH?! There is no way that I'm doing 16+ more hours of this! No! Way!

While we were watching tv last night (some commercial about fishing), I looked at Steve while I bounced on my ball and said, "I wish YOU could do this part." And he said, "Oh, going fishing? I wanna do that too!" And then I mentally slapped him upside the head and said, "NO. This part. This birthing the baby part. YOU need to do it." And then he tried giving me a pep talk and told me that wasn't the right frame of mind or something else stupid that a man whose never given birth would say.

I know my doctor told me not to go to the hospital until it was "time" because they would just hook me up to monitors and bug me with checks and offer interventions and all that jazz, but honestly? Right now? I think I'd love the change of scenery. And people around me that are awake. And at least I could find out if there's even any PROGRESS down there. I guess that's what I'm most worried about- after all of this timing and bouncing and breathing and listening to Hypnobabies, there could still be something like NO CHANGE centimeters-wise, and that would be muy discouraging. Add to that the fact that last night (or, well, the night before last I should say), I listened to Hypnobabies on repeat three times, and in between the times where my iPod shut off and I woke up to turn it back on, I had a dream that I had a c-section. And it was SO REAL. Well, some of it was clearly fake, because they offered an ultrasound first (beginning signs that this is a dream! I think I even heard Tricare laughing!), and then the ultrasound was way better than any 4D ultrasound and my baby waved at me like a cartoon character. And then I was very nonchalant about getting a c-section, like, "Oh ok! That's fine! Cut me open!" And they did. Now WHY would I have a dream about a c-section after listening to seven different scripts about natural birth?? Hmmm??? I am at a loss.

So anyways, looking back over this contraction timer history, I started timing at 3:50am, it's now 4:50am, and my contractions are consistently lasting one minute, but are spaced out to around just under seven minutes apart. This doesn't sound like awesome progress to me, but it sure FEELS like SOMETHING. So we'll see what happens. I was so hoping to have a baby picture to post by now, but this child CLEARLY has other ideas! As usual! Where do these hard-headed children come from? Clearly Steve's DNA is winning out once again. I am bound to be the only brunette in my little red-headed family. <sigh> PRAY FOR ME. Thanks.