Top priorities currently: finding out where my mom jeans are and a functioning a/c system in my car

I started out thinking that today was going to be one of the most hellish days of my life. I had an appointment in Nashville to have the a/c in my car repaired. (Nope! No one but the DEALER would agree to touch it, so off we go!)

There was no way they would do it on a Saturday (ya know, when STEVE could come and help toddler-wrangle), they had no cars to loan me to escape the dealership (which, I don't get- you're a CAR DEALER. There's gotta be a few of those lying around somewhere), and my appointment was scheduled during Sam's morning nap, which also happens to be rush hour in Nashville. We can all see where this is headed. I saw it too, so I went ahead and applied a double coating of my prescription-strength deodorant and put on my big girl panties. You can't ever be too cautious in situations like these.

Despite the rain, Sam and I managed to leave at a time that wasn't too far behind the time I originally anticipated leaving. I was so stressed that I would leave something important behind; I mean, we were going to be spending an unknown amount of hours sitting inside of a car dealership during BOTH NAPTIMES. So I packed EVERYTHING: books, blocks, cars, trucks, the random trash recyclables he usually plays with, new snacks, lunch, a sippy cup, pacifier (don't judge), stroller, and diapers. By the grace of God I remembered to bring the wet bag for the dirty diapers, and that probably saved the day. Because the stink- it was there.

We hit rush hour traffic in Nashville (because apparently someone with only a quarter of a brain was allowed to design the roadways for this place) and managed to get through without muttering too many profanities or getting killed. I'll call that a success. Once we got to the dealer, I parked the car and started unloading. The man assisting me asked if he could see my insurance and license. I thought this a wee bit odd, but whatever. I proved to him that I legitimately drive this car around and then he asked me if we were planning on staying here (at the dealership). I said yes and he said, "Oh, well I don't need this info then. I thought you were planning on taking one of our loaner cars out while we worked on yours." Well HOWDY! Hand me the keys! Of COURSE we'll take it! I got the brand-spankin' new version of my car. It had New Car Smell and everything. I told Sam not to fart because then he would ruin the smell of the car. He sharted. I think he likes to ruin things like New Car Smell for me.

After tossing my keys off to the car man, Sam and I took off in the new car. We went a little ways down the road to the mall. Because it was raining and Nashville has REAL MALLS and I had also misplaced the time to eat breakfast this morning, this seemed like a good idea. Except I really didn't wanna leave the new car smell. But I could also smell that it was diaper-change-time, so we went in. This mall had really great bathrooms, kid play places, and a CHICK-FIL-A. So obviously, needs were met. (And HELLO, welcome to Mom World. When those three things about a mall stand out in your mind as A Good Mall Experience, I think you've officially crossed over to The Other Side. Where are my token mom jeans?)

Since we avoided the morning nap altogether today, I thought it wise to leave before we experienced a complete meltdown due to not having an afternoon nap too. One more trip to the bathroom (as someone assured me with various hand gestures that he had produced a "stinky") and we were back in the car. That was not before I almost dropped my son on his flippin' head due to the fact that this giant SUV saw it necessary to park three inches from my car. I mean, when you gotta fold in your side mirrors to fit next to me, simple logic should tell you that THIS SPOT IS TOO SMALL FOR YOUR HUGE A$$ SUV. Also, there was just no way that me, my nine-days-from-due-date-belly, AND my son were going to be able to open the door and squeeze in. So we went in the hard way. And I may or may not have cursed. A lot. Because really. That is ridiculous. The mall was not so crowded that there were no other spots available. Please consider walking the extra five steps before parking that close to me again. I considered leaving a VERY ugly note on their windshield, but rats, I wasn't in my car, which means I didn't have access to my stock of pens and paper. They got lucky today. But don't worry- that diaper bag deficiency has been NOTED and will be taken care of soon.

Since we were still two-ish hours out from the guesstimated car pickup time, I decided that Sam and I would just do some exploratory driving. I will preface this with the fact that I have never had any success with exploratory driving. I always ALWAYS end up in the ghetto. Or next to a river. But usually in a very scary part of town. And sometimes a GPS leads me there ON PURPOSE. So I had no high hopes for this drive, other than getting the small person to sleep for a little while.

Blurry photo courtesy of the fact that I can't hold still when I'm so pumped about naptime.

But APPARENTLY, there is a lot of money hiding in those Tennessee foothills! The houses! They were gigantic! The horses! They were for show! The wealth! It was everywhere! It was AWESOME. I only wish that Steve could have been there to gawk with me and drive so that I could gawk in a safer fashion. We drove all over the place. At some point, I noticed that Sam fell asleep. Mission accomplished. But I kept driving because there wasn't much else to do and the scenery was amazing! Sam finally woke up (friggin' loud blinker!!), so I decided that we would turn around and attempt to head back to where we came from. We still had at least an hour and a half til the car was supposed to be ready, but I figured that he could make use of all of this crap I lugged down here with us and play at the dealership. Imagine my surprise when they called to tell us they were done early! Yeehaw!

We skedaddled back and (sadly) pried the keys out of my hands swapped cars, changed another diaper, handed over a large sum of money, and basked in the cool air that was coming out of my air vents. Ahh. Life is good again.