That time we took our kids to a casino/waterpark

The kids are on Day 2 of 2 of their "spring break." I say it in quotations because it does not feel like spring or a break (to me), but they got Good Friday off and today, Easter Monday. We got wind that our friends might be going to an indoor waterpark last week and thought we might tag along. Indoor waterparks are plentiful here in Minnesota. Most hotels have an indoor pool, but usually more, with a kiddie play area/splash pad and a hot tub. Seeing firsthand how long the winters drag on (and on. and on. AND ON. IT IS 30* TODAY I AM ACTUALLY GOING A LITTLE NUTS), it makes sense to have such an energy-burning attraction indoors. There are lots of Indian reservations around us, and on the reservations are casinos. This particular casino had a waterpark inside as well and when our friends asked us if we wanted to go, we looked at booking a room online and it was only $40 (we stayed on a Thursday night since the kids had Friday off from school). Despite this casino setup only being an hour away, we decided to stay the night because $40, and also because the waterpark stayed open til 10pm, so we figured they'd pass out instantly anyway, no matter what time they ended up in bed. We checked the kids out of school an hour early.

They were HIGHLY PEEVED. I was a bit taken aback by this reaction because I was excited to get out of school for any reason whatsoever when I was little. Despite my ruining their lives by pulling them out of class an hour early, we stopped at the gas station for cheetos and the day was somewhat redeemed. Sam did ask if we could please go to Colt and Mav's house after the surprise because he and Colt had plans to wrestle that afternoon. Little did he know that his friends were joining us at the surprise.

The kids were very surprised and excited, and once they got in the water, they thought they had discovered heaven on earth. I didn't take many pictures, but tried to get some videos of them. Steve took Sam down the big yellow slide (seen in the background of the pic above) and since Sam hadn't been down any slides yet, he agreed. Steve reassured him that if it got going too fast, he could probably slow them down. Well. According to Steve afterwards, there was no slowing down, and force does indeed equal mass times acceleration and their masses were accelerating with no intention of slowing down. Sam looked like he had just been baptized in the muddy Mississippi as he ascended from the water and then vowed he was NEVER going to do that again. (Had he gone down by himself, he would have gone much slower, as we witnessed plenty of kids Sam's size not flying down like human torpedoes. You live and you learn. And sometimes you get water up your nose.)

Will was very unimpressed with this massive bathtub situation and much preferred to watch the endless action surrounding him. Once Sam and Molly found the smaller slides, they did not mind jumping in with both feet and seemed to go between the big pool, lazy river, and kids' area without so much as looking in our direction. (Thus, the constant wearing of the puddle jumpers. I have a known case of insanity and I'm not looking to make it worse.)

Funnily enough, they most preferred hanging with their friends in the hot tub. Possibly because as the afternoon wore on and more families arrived, the waterpark started to more closely resemble the Wild West. There were maybe three lifeguards posted in various pool chairs about the park, but they did look as if they might run faster to a pizza than a drowning person. (I say this as a person who will definitely run faster towards pizza than danger.) Rules (or "rules") were definitely not enforced. As a former lifeguard, I always feel super conscious of my kids doing stupid rule-breaking things (like the run-walk with their hands by their sides and their feet moving 20mph) and tend to police them a little harder than most because I remember being the one responsible for looking after all of these bobbers in the pool and don't want MY kids to be the trouble makers. But here? It seemed that if a child was not actively scaling a tube slide from the outside, then all was fine. I'll admit, it was kind of nice in a lawless sort of way. My kids already knew what not to do so it was just a matter of making sure they were within eyesight. No whistles constantly blowing and authority figures patrolling. On the flip side, other people's kids were insane and at one point, the fire alarm went off. I kid you not, the lifeguards stood up and just stared at each other. No hustling people to exits or directing or whistle-blowing. Some people just started packing things up and walking back towards the casino. Not outside, but away from the giant water-filled, flameless park and into the smoking-allowed casino. I don't pretend to understand people, but I am constantly amused by them.

We headed back to our room around 9ish and got everyone showered. My children, completely unaware of how cable tv works, were extremely disappointed there was no "kid shows" on at 9:30 at night. They settled for some college baseball and before I had even climbed into bed, Sam was passed out.

I'm not gonna lie- Steve and I did not sleep well that night. I made the unfortunate mistake of googling hotel reviews that morning and let's just say that at $40 per night, you might possibly get what you pay for. We contemplated not staying the night and just driving back, but the kids were so looking forward to spending the next morning at the waterpark with their friends that we really felt guilted into staying. And while I didn't SEE any bedbugs, that doesn't mean I didn't lie awake half the night imagining every little twitchy feeling being a bedbug. ((BLEACH BATHS FOR EVERYONE))

Despite all the excitement and the almost 10pm bedtime, Will was up and screeching like a banana-hungry hyena at 6:30. The pool didn't open until 9. I will let you guess how long my snacks and Baby Einstein videos on my phone kept him entertained....

He is cute but he is also A LOT OF WORK.

We had to check out by 11am, and since it was Good Friday and since there is also not a single restaurant within 60 miles of the casino (not including our residence, of course), we were on the road slightly before 11. I threw crackers and granola bars at the kids until they fell asleep from cornfield-induced boredom. We slapped together some peanut butter (or honey, in Sam's case) and jelly sandwiches after showering the kids again (must.eradicate.germs.) and then headed down to Fargo. The kids were all tired and somewhat cranky from the less than 24 hour vacation, so we figured going somewhere and accomplishing something was better than staying home and possibly going insane.

Shaggy Sammy got a much-needed haircut.

before

after

Steve did too, but his transformation wasn't as dramatic. We went to pick up the boys' Easter shoes that I had ordered online and then attempted a "quick" run into Target. Laughable on the Friday before Easter. What a madhouse. Steve forgot something he needed, so we got the kids snacks and went outside to watch cars and people.

Pro tip: if you ask for a small popcorn split into two bags, you tend to get A SHIT TON OF POPCORN for $1. (Molly is inside the cart.)

We got back home and took a walk around town, stopping to jump on our friend's trampoline. Breakfast for dinner and then everyone to bed. Nice, clean beds. Ahhhh......