We're like the Pilgrims. Except we're going to Asia this time.

So. A scary glimpse into my future happened yesterday. Steve went out to lunch recently with one of his buddies by the airfield. Amazing hotdogs! Great prices! The sweet tea was really good! I think we should go there!

Ok.

I pack up some snacks for the kids and off we go. We walk inside and...... it's a bar. Beer banners, neon lights, UFC fights on the tv- BAR. I look at Steve. "I don't think they have any highchairs in here." "I'll find one, you just get in line." I walk over to the line and I can feel the stares. The only people there are military men and scruffy maintenance dudes. This is clearly not a place where you bring your toddler-laden FAMILY to eat lunch. We ate our (unremarkable) hot dogs and headed home soon after, leaving a trail of crushed-up goldfish in our wake.

Steve- preparing for the inevitable slap from an overly-enthusiastic Miss America Molly.

What made Steve think that this would be a good place to bring our children? (Besides the hot dog part, shut up.) This man will be picking out our house for us in Korea. ALONE. I won't be there and I will have to rely on him to make the best decision for us. I want so badly to be one of those wives that will just roll with the punches and trust her husband completely. But I will be real and honest and confess that giving up the control here scares the bajeezus outta me. I don't want to live in a hot dog bar! Wah!

*******

A Korea update is in order, yes? I have found zero information on the interwebs about families moving to Korea with their soldier. And if I have, it's all very very outdated. The conflicting information we have received from every office on this post has led me to believe that maybe we are the first family to ever move to Korea from Fort Campbell. EVER.

Seriously, Mom?

Please feel free to confirm or deny.

We can confirm that Molly has dried banana on the side of her face, but that's about it.

We recently learned that we got command sponsorship. Basically this means that the Army has extended an invitation for us to live in Korea. We would show up regardless, but I much prefer for our presence to be desired, you know? Also, I want to be on the list (the evacuation list, that is) should Lil' Kim ever see what his barber did to his head and go nuts all over his neighbor to the south.

Can't buy hair like this, Kim. (Although I'd like to.)

Let me back up (in case someone is on here looking for helpful info about PCSing to Korea). We are on the accelerated version of normal Korea PCSing. We have a maximum of three months to get everything done, when the Army usually gives you six. I won't get into my feelings about this, but while most of our processes have happened back-to-back, it might take longer if you are doing a normal 6-month prep. Anyways. On with the show. Before we got CS (command sponsorship), Steve had to apply for a sponsor. (Use DA form 5434.) Naturally, we got a bogus sponsor, not even a guy from his gaining unit, but whatever. That box was checked and we could proceed. We all had to get physicals and an EFMP (Exceptional Family Member Program) screening. I had to do a CHADIS (no clue what that stands for) questionnaire online about my children's milestones and if they are progressing at an acceptable rate. After you have been cleared by all of the appropriate people, you will need to get no-fee government passports for the dependents. After you apply for the passports, you get some sort of number off of the application (hopefully the office people can help you here...) and you can submit your application for CS. I think it takes 14 business days to hear back from Korea on whether or not you've been approved.
Apparently some people get orders that say "concurrent travel" on them (meaning you are authorized to travel with your soldier). People around Ft Campbell made it sound like this was a common thing. We are learning now that it is not. Most likely you will get "deferred travel". So your soldier will go ahead of you and secure housing, his orders will get amended, and you will then be allowed to schedule your HHG (household goods) shipment and flights. I know, none of this is convenient. In fact, it's all incredibly frustrating. All of the unknowns and waiting is nerve-wracking. I wish I had something uplifting to say like, "It all went by so fast!" But it didn't. So I won't say that. Just try to spend your time researching your new home instead of worrying over things that are out of your control. (Soooooo much easier said than done!)

Initially, we were planning on having our HHG's packed and moved by mid-June. We would spend the rest of the summer traveling to see family and going on vacation. But vacation requires leave days. And Steve is now saving his leave days to come back and get us so that I don't have to make an international flight with two small children by myself. (The man loves me and my sanity.) So we are stuck here for the summer. Luckily, we have family that is willing to travel to us. Unfortunately for them, we still live in Clarksville and there isn't squat to do here. I'm sure that's nothing that some Dollar Tree bubbles and new sidewalk chalk can't fix though. I will reward all visitors with the alcoholic beverage of your choice! Open invitation! Schedule your visit today! (said in my best car dealer voice)

So, to summarize, the new-and-improved plan:

Steve will leave for Korea by himself.
I will sob and whine and throw a tantrum and eat cereal for dinner 8 nights out of 7 and drink wine when the cereal runs out.
Then Steve will find us a house. This is clearly not a decision I want to be a part of. Thanks Army. (I hate to blame an entire gender, but that was clearly a man's decision.)
He will get that stupid paper amended saying he has a house.
Then we will schedule movers.
Then we will arrange flights.
Then Steve will take leave and come home. (The Army will not pay for that since "I am capable" of flying international with two small children by myself. Hello more man-rules.) (PS. I am not capable. Deployment wrecked my sanity. Ain't nobody gonna survive that flight if I have to do it alone.)
He will help me pack up our house and wrangle the kids on the flight.
He will show us our new home for the next two years and I will pray and pray and beg and plead with God that it is not a hot dog bar.


PS. I got an email saying I was nominated for a Top 25 Military Mom thing. Wanna vote for me here? (As of right now, I'm still on the "pending approval" side.) Gamsahabnida! (Which is Korean for "thank you!" I'm sure I won't have any trouble with the language barrier over there....)