That one day streak was really impressive huh

So.... I quickly realized that since I'm no longer pumping, I no longer have any reason to sit at the end of the day. Which means I don't have a ton of time to blog anymore. But I refuse to let this thing die! Even if it's painfully obvious that it needs to.

This past week went by fairly quickly. We have been so busy. And by we I mean me of course. The kids are busy making messes and dirtying laundry and asking me what else they can eat (THE OPTIONS LITERALLY NEVER CHANGE OMG) and I am mostly refereeing and trying to keep everyone alive, fed, and clean (and in that order). I hardly make it til 9:30 most nights before I am konked out asleep.

The rhythm is good though. I think we need it and it will help the time pass by a bit quicker and easier, even if it does all but kill me. I swear Hank is the best baby I've ever had (sorry you other three). He is fairly low maintenance, sleeps amazingly well, and even naps fairly consistently. But I'm not sure what it is- I never stop feeling like I've been hit by a train. No matter how much coffee I drink, I am always ready to jump right back in bed. Will has taken an interest in waking up at 5am these days though, so I don't see any sleeping in in my near future.

In my "on this day" feature in my photos, I am seeing photos pop up of toddler Sam and baby Molly right before Steve deployed. So crazy that it's been five years since that happened. And here we are again- same season, babies the same ages (almost), and even in a house with the same layout! Bizarre.

The kids started AWANA this past week and love it. Sam had his first soccer game last Saturday (they lost, but it opened up a nice discussion on being a graceful loser). Molly is still doing dance and really well at school, and in her spare time, she finds six billion questions to lob my way. Will is in this terrible phase where he doesn't talk yet, but desperately needs/wants to, so instead he just slaps anyone that doesn't respond to him the way he wants them to. This has made playdates exponentially harder, as I have to up my referee/lifeguard game and frequently yell mid-sentence for him to quit doing something he's not supposed to be doing. I know it's a phase, but man, it's an ugly one. Not to be Negative Nancy on Will- he counters these frustrated outbursts with THE sweetest, most heart-melting moments; he will walk up to me and squeeze my legs in a big hug, or come kiss Hank on the head, belly flop onto Molly and give her a kiss, giggle as he chases Sam, and hold my hand and snuggle with me. He is my sweet boy and even when he's bad, I can't help but love him to death. Hank officially started formula. I gave him some breastmilk after having given him a bottle of formula and he kinda acted like it tasted awful. So the few bags left in the freezer will be used for random diaper rashes and anything else that needs breastmilk thrown at it. The kids are still doing Sunday school after mass and even though they took away childcare during mass (you can probably hear me sobbing from here), we are still going to attempt to go and practice sitting still and being quiet. Will isn't terrible. He does fairly well during the first half. But the last half really requires a lot of work to keep him still, and I'm hoping that sitting near friends will help the situation. Maybe I can pass Hank off to them if I need to chase Will down. I have started going to PWOC again and love it. My friend Rachel is leading a Bible study at her church each week, so I am going to start going to that as well to support her! Toss in a few playdates, grocery shopping, remembering to put gas in the car (this is very hard for me), meal prep, reviewing spelling words and schoolwork, cleaning the house, laundry, refilling the mother $@*!~ baby wipes containers, and I am freaking SPENT. I fall face first into bed most nights and don't so much as move a muscle until Hank wakes me up in the morning (or the middle of the night- whatever).

And with that, Will is awake from his nap. Oh, and Hank too! Lovely. Who needs alone time. Not me. #blessed

But seriously, I feel super blessed lately.

Sweating: the details

Coming at you live from the couch, utilizing my sit-down time (pumping) and my hands-free pumping bra (I can see my reflection in the computer screen and it's horrifying) to recap the day. Our days are usually pretty busy but today was insane. And I'm not sure how much or how often I'll be able to speak to Steve, so I figured I'd write it all out here. If he ever gets some sort of internet access and the desire to fall asleep reading about some stay at home mom minutiae, I can hook him up. Maybe I can recap nightly. Maybe just this week and never again. We'll see how it goes.

This morning started off with a 2am wakeup from Hank, parched and starving to death. I got him back down around 3:30 and went back to bed. Alarm at 5:15 because BUS DAY. The suburban must have gotten wind that it was paid off, so naturally it decided to die a horrible death soon after. The headlights wouldn't turn off until the battery was dead, so if we wanted to go anywhere, we had to use Steve's car to jump mine off and get her goin. Then either leave it running or pray it started back up again while we were out. (Love living dangerously.) I had an appointment at a Chevy dealer this morning to get it fixed, but did not want to attempt jumping the suburban off in the dark and with the possibility that it might not start at all (although I did have a tow scheduled just in case), so the kids rode the buses to school.

They go to different schools, and ride different buses, and those buses are on two wildly different schedules. Sam's bus comes at 6:40. As in the morning 6:40. Insanity, right? So I got up extra early to make sure we all got there in time. He made the bus, we walked back home, putzed around (fed babies), and walked back up to the bus stop for Molly's bus 45 minutes later. I pushed the small two home and got the cars ready for the big jump.

Miraculously, it only took about 15 minutes to charge my battery enough to start and I was able to cancel the tow. We drove to the dealer (about a half hour away) and handed over the car. Will was somewhat contained in the showroom, watching all of the cars and trucks driving by outside the big windows. One of the salesmen commented on how hyper his grandchildren are (and I started to cringe), but then told me how calm Will is in comparison. Annnnnnnd exhale. But also lol because it does not feel that way to me. We only waited an hour and a half and only paid a minimal charge and we were on our way. Oh what was wrong with it? Just some wires and their protective coating burned off, that's all. Mechanic was a little surprised nothing had caught fire yet, no big deal. CERTIFIED PRE-OWNED MY ASS, NYC CHEVY DEALER. We also found a condom in the headrest the other day while cleaning out the car, so maybe a fiery explosion in the engine is small beans compared to what the rest of that car was put through prior to becoming our wholesome family wagon.

We came home, I threw food at Will, attempted to pump, Hank screamed at the slowness of it all, and I finally put Will down for a nap before feeding Hank. Managed to eat lunch during naptime but that was about it because we had to do diaper changes before walking to the bus stop to pick up Molly. I changed Hank, then changed Will. Heard Hank loudly and wetly (<--no squiggly line, that's a word) fart. So I changed Hank again. Went to find Will and he was looking mighty guilty so I asked if he pooped and he smacked his bottom Britney Spears style and gave me a grunt. Changed Will again. Loaded them up in the stroller and walked up to the bus stop. Got Molly off the bus (bus was running late. AGAIN.) and headed home. We grabbed her dance stuff, some snacks for the kids, some milk bottles, buckled everyone in, and rushed up to Sam's school to pick him up.

Except when I got there, there was no pickup line, no teachers standing outside, nothing. I seriously thought by the time I got Molly off the bus, I'd just cruise right on in and pick him up and avoid the line. (His bus gets home at the same time that Molly's dance class starts.) Get everybody out of the car, hustle into school, walk of shame into the office, retrieve Sam, hustle back out to the car, buckle everyone back in, zoom into town. Of course it was the first day of dance, the place was a freakin' zoo. Cars everywhere, dance moms everywhere, and then there was me, herding my three cats and big ass carseat through the tiny little entry area. I got Molly to the door she was supposed to go in and asked her teacher if they sold little ribbon ties for the tap shoes because I didn't have any but brought some shoelaces.... I hate being that person.... Of course they don't sell ribbon ties and my shoelaces were garbage, so they ended up making her laces out of hair ties (geniuses) and I noticed that I did not even rip out the tape on the inside of her shoe that said $3. Thrift shop, y'all. And they were half off when I bought them too, but I'm gonna let them think I paid the full $3 like a baller.

Checkin' out the ladies... Hank looks like he's seen some shit, but he's fine.

Anyways, it was obvious that none of the boys would last in that place for an entire hour, so we shuffled BACK out to the car, got everyone buckled back in, headed up to Sonic to see if they are selling alcoholic slushies yet (a sad, hard no), got some water instead, and headed back to the dance studio to wait for Molly's class to end. Shuffled everybody back inside the crowded dance studio only to see that they let the parents in the class at some point (?!) and got Molly. She had a GREAT time at the class and was thrilled by it all. I am already dying at the thought of seeing her at her dance recital. Cannot wait.

Killin' me with the cute!

We got home and surprise! Dinnertime rush. Once everyone was inside, I attempted to slap together some pb&j sandwiches, but realized that I never took the bread out of the freezer. Womp womp. I also have that kid that's allergic to peanut butter. Hmm. Found three hot dog buns and decided those chicken sausages were destined live like hot dogs. The trick is putting enough ketchup on them and then distracting the kids with something else while they eat them. Mission accomplished. I fed Hank and once the natives started getting restless, we all headed upstairs to do bathtime. Easily the most dreadful part of the day. The awkward leaning into the tub, wondering if I'm scrubbing enough or if soap touching them is passable, water shooting everywhere, so much sweating, rushing to bathe them as quickly as possible before Hank loses his mind again in the other room. So fun.

Once they're all bathed and teeth brushed, Hank freaks so I take him downstairs and warm up some milk for him. Molly follows me minutes later and says something about the Mighty Machines movie being over. Cue bedtime! And cue whining. We say prayers and I carefully chuck them all into bed, kissing them goodnight while threatening them with something awful (I don't know what yet... but something.) if they dare come out of their rooms. Change Hank, swaddle Hank, feed Hank into a milk coma. As soon as I put him down he wakes up. So I turn on the rocker and turn off the light and tell the big two to go back to bed as I run down the stairs to make myself some dinner. Which turns out to be what I was going to make myself for breakfast, but I never had time for that this morning. Surprisingly delicious, but the bottom of my shoe probably would have tasted good by that point I was so hungry. Load the dishwasher, wash everything in the sink, prep coffeepot, lock doors, make a mental note to take out the trash tomorrow (I'm definitely gonna forget), and finish pumping.

Side note: I'm giving up the pumping. Long story short, I just don't have the time! Obviously! Which hurts me (and my boobs specifically) because I know that I am really good at making milk! My body can make all this great free food and yet I don't have the schedule to allow for the milk to come out. And there is no way in hell that I'm trying to actually breastfeed again. I attempted it the other day and almost died waiting for him to clamp down on me. (I've got some bad latch PTSD.) But instead of clamping down he just looked horrified (wtfffffffff Mahhhhhhmmmmmm stahhhhp) until I quit trying. So I ordered some formula and that was that. I'm waiting for my boobs to quit with the supply already and my freezer stash is slowly dwindling. Kinda sad but I'm also kinda ready. Operation Deployment Bod needs to get goin' and that can't happen if Operation Milk Factory is still in full-on production mode.

Well I'm done pumping now and need to shower because besides making milk and a big scene at the Chevy dealer, I did a lot of sweating today. And that will wear a girl out.

I'm sure this post was only about 50% coherent as my mind is still running as fast as the day did, but hey-o I did it! I blogged! Finally. Goodnight.

Life with 4- a photo-laden update of sorts

Thank you for all the warm wishes surrounding Hank's arrival!


Time to resuscitate this ol' blog!! I have so many pictures from before Hank's birth and afterwards, that they won't line up with this update at all. Just go with it.

A rainy day back during the Three Amigos time period

It rains so much here in Louisiana. The kids love it. I love it so long as I'm not out trying to run to the car during a downpour. They love splashing around in puddles and I'm kinda digging the rainy day photos I've been getting out of it too.

I'm officially done buying toys for the rest of my life. You heard it here first, folks. I have the basics for Will and Hank to play with (blocks, cars, train tracks, etc), but Sam and Molly are literally asking me for permission to play with the recycling. I kid you not. Then they grab the old pizza box and the Powerade bottle and play restaurant. They have these plastic power tools that I spend more time picking up the plastic screws and bolts than they ever have playing with the toy, so we had some extra wood the other day (from Steve's snake prevention project on the back porch), and used it to teach them how to use some real power tools. We give kids all these plastic versions of grown up things (play kitchens, play vacuums, play strollers)- shoot. Time to get yourself in a real kitchen, make some real food! Use a real vacuum, clean up a real mess! Push a real stroller, learn how to care for a real baby! I'm half kidding- my kids won't be suddenly using an oven unsupervised or caring for Hank (in ANY capacity), but I feel like they are hitting an age where toys no longer hold their attention and they need something more. So we are going to be doing a toy purge soon (saving the things I know Will and Hank will get use out of) and eliminating a lot of useless crap in our house, and hopefully learning how to use the real-life versions of the toys they no longer play with. I can't wait.

These kids have had their sweet moments with each other, but overall, I am just so done with summer. Get these kids the hell out of this house and back into school. They need some structure and I am not able to provide that 24/7. Nor do I want to. I have enough to do keeping up with the endless laundry and meal prep and cleaning and baby needs. Trying to play Activities Coordinator for the (extremely sassy) big two is pushing me over the edge. Some parents cry when their children go to kindergarten or start a new grade. Not this mama. I will be clicking my heels and probably popping open a bottle of champagne come the first day of school. Because sometimes surviving is cause for celebration.

One of the projects we (and by we I mean Steve) tackled before Hank was born was this random nook in our upstairs hallway. I might have mentioned before (but maybe not because pregnancy brain) that this house is the exact same layout as our house at Ft Campbell. It's smaller and a bit darker, but the rooms are in the same places. At Ft Campbell though, this hallway nook had doors and shelves and was a legit linen closet. I'm not sure what housing expects you to use a random cutout like this for, but since we had just made some shelves in Minnesota for our laundry room, we decided to make a few more for linen storage.

random, useless nook before

These projects are eight frillion times harder to do with kids running around everywhere, so once we got everyone bathed, we put the television babysitter on downstairs for the big two and let Will hang out with us upstairs. Before long though, Will was ready for bed. His room is approximately four feet from this nook. We weren't going to waste the opportunity to finish this project though, so we put Will to bed and continued on, drilling shelves into the wall and making a ton of racket. It makes me laugh to think about how no one could dare sneeze while Sam was sleeping as a baby. Because MY GOD THE CHILD NEEDS QUIET. Nowadays, Hank snoozes as I vacuum three inches from him, kids screaming, music going, etc. Old motto (1 kid): Keep quiet, baby is sleeping. New motto (4 kids): Keep making noise so he can learn to sleep through anything.

I've since put more things on the shelves, but took this immediately after he hung them. They also look like they're unevenly spaced, but we measured before, during, and after, and decided that the angle the picture is taken makes them look mis-spaced. I am also on the hunt for some tall baskets or something to sit underneath (and maybe store some winter blankets and quilts in). The amount of time I've put into the actual hunt: 0 minutes because ain't nobody got time to be wandering stores alone these days (and nobody's got the spare sanity to lug kids around anywhere "just to look").

This is not real life lol but it is kinda cute

Fresh Prince of Ft Polk

me, pretty much the entire third trimester

Will taking full advantage of the bump

due date day!

I was so ready to be pregnant forever. Lightheadedness aside, it's just so much easier than never sleeping. I'm not gonna lie though, it was getting old having Steve and my mom stare at me like April the Giraffe.

I finally got a new ID card. I only seem to get new ones when I'm 9 months pregnant. Naturally. Luckily for me, the lady didn't make me look super pregnant, but she did apply a filter that essentially erased my nose and gave my teeth a look that resembles Mountain Dew mouth. (And yes, Mt Dew mouth is totally a thing and it's absolutely disgusting.) I might go through the hassle of getting a new ID when Special Steve gets promoted. Yeah, it's that bad, eek!

Sam got Army short shorts off the local yard sale page and is obsessed. They make him run faster, y'all.

post-dinner swim time - my mom said I shouldn't go in the pool because what if my water breaks? Steve said if I did deliver the baby in the pool, it would kinda be the ultimate water birth. Neither one of those things happened, FYI.

Look at this goof who dressed himself.

Yeah, their new schools require uniforms and you won't hear me complaining about that AT ALL.

Her choice in posing is odd, but whatever

so Korean

picture from my mom while we were at the hospital

The day we came home from the hospital, we were rushing around, trying to get everyone in bed at a decent hour (so we could get in bed to not sleep) and Sam came rushing down the stairs.

Lost his second tooth! So proud. He said he just twisted it til he could rip it right out. His choice of verbiage really makes me cringe, but I do believe it happened just like that. He had been waiting a while for that tooth to come out. Luckily, I remembered to do the Tooth Fairy duties. Almost forgot to chuck the tooth out though. MY BRAIN. MY MOM BRAIN.

I decided to pump for Hank. Most everyone is like, "why? That is just so much work." But honestly? Is it really more work? It felt like a lot more work to be the only person who could ever feed, pacify, or put Will to sleep for his entire first year. Yes, it might have been convenient to "whip out" a boob whenever it was needed with no prep work involved, but being able to pass off a cranky baby to Steve (or any other nearby semi qualified bystander) and go take a nap? I tell you what, that sh!t is priceless. My mental health is worth putting some bottles in a dishwasher (heyyyyy, having a dishwasher is really awesome) and browsing instagram while I do my dairy cow duties. To each her own of course, but after trying both ways, I just really think pumping is awesome and it is definitely the only thing that makes sense for me.

literally liquid gold

One night Hank woke up at midnight and was up until 6am. I could hear my attached neighbor getting up and going to PT and that was probably one of the most depressing nights of my life. I just wanted to pass Hank off so badly and go to sleep. And come 6am, after Steve had gotten a few hours of sleep, I did. I think I slept three hours and then the party was over and I had to get back to life. LUCKILY, that was the only night that's happened. I don't wanna talk sleeping habits because I feel like it's dangerous to put out info like that (I don't wanna jinx anything), but I am no longer feeling like crying into a baby blanket at 4am.

It's obvious that we did nothing to celebrate the 4th of July, right? Right.

Hank is SUCH a sweetie. As well as the older three have adjusted to having a new one around, I feel like Hank deserves 10x the credit for adjusting into this circus so well. Outside of wanting to eat when he wants to eat, he doesn't fuss about much of anything. (And trust me, he has every reason to fuss about his current living conditions. It is LOUD and HOT and LOUD LOUD LOUD all the time. I probably fuss a lot more than Hank does.)

Our neighbors all have power wheels and my kids are ridiculously obsessed with them. I've been looking for one on the local yard sale pages, but I'll admit that I haven't been looking too hard. I feel like we need a big piece of plastic like we need a hole in the head, and acquiring one of those things is certain to push me to the point of buying a whistle so I can better referee these tiny psychos. Aka no thanks (unless I see one for suuuuuuuper cheap. Then I might be persuaded).

Poor Will is typically not vocal enough to earn himself a spot in the power wheels, so he just chases after it until he is the color of a tomato, but he finally got a ride and was SO HAPPY.

Behold the power of television. They don't get to watch tv very often, but when they do, it definitely produces the desired effect (aka silence).

It is SO weird to think that Will ever fit into this tiny newborn sleeper. Hank has already moved on to 3 month outfits, but I managed to shove him into this sleeper once.

One of my best friends from Korea is stationed here at Polk, and we finally managed to get together. Since we last saw each other, we have added three more babies to the mix, but having everyone together was so fun. I love meeting new people (one of the best parts of Army life), but it really is special to get to reconnect with old friends who know you and know what you mean when you say something or make a joke or tell a story. Not having to give a backstory to provide meaning or context is invaluable sometimes.

The last time we saw Lorene, Molly was calling her Baby Lorene (or Baby Wohween), and now Baby Lorene is walking and talking and a full grown TODDLER CHILD and time just flies by too fast.

The boys bonded over a shared love of snacks and I feel like that's a positive way to start a friendship.

Milk production has obviously increased. This felt like a big deal at the time. Last night though I pumped 10oz in one sitting and have been steadily putting milk in the deep freezer everyday. Smells like freedom to me.

The kids are officially registered for CYS and soccer camp. Due to insurance switcheroos and late physicals (complete with shots!), they weren't able to sign up for as many sports camps as they would have liked. But they will be doing some fall sports and hopefully will get to do more next summer when there isn't a newborn sucking the life out of me.

sweat, sweat, sweat

Willie got his first haircut. I didn't cry. I did die inside a bit though.

But first we'll watch big brother to see how it's done

curls

upon curls

upon curls

I couldn't bear to watch, so I took photos instead.

Lollipops for the whole gang (and yes, Steve is holding a bag of Will's curls).

my little butterscotch-smelling baby

He's probably looking forward to his first real bath (let's be real, he's had a few sponge baths already) as much as I am.

Sam learned to ride with no training wheels!!!!!!

I pink puffy heart when the sun goes behind that tree and we aren't melting in direct sunlight anymore.

playtime at the park on Steve's last day of paternity leave

National Ice Cream Day

studmuffin

My tiny had his 2 week well check and is doing... well! Gained a pound and a little bit of length.

Steve went back to work and we have all survived. So far.

Burning energy as fast as daylight

The neighbors let them play on their slip n slide. Sam has never felt closer to heaven.

Will, not a huge fan of getting wet, has never felt hotter.

I have more pictures but I think that's enough for now because this has been LENGTHY. If you made it all the way to the end, congratulations! Send me your address and I'll mail you a birth announcement as a prize.