life with the lieutenant

• So the last time we spoke, we were still living with my in-laws, still eating Halloween candy, and still waiting on our kitchen to become functional. Well. Let me tell you what. Everything has changed. And by everything, I do mean everything.

• For starters, we do not receive a newspaper every morning and this disappoints Sam greatly. I'm sure my in-laws' neighbors are grateful that there is no longer a half-naked child running out to the end of the driveway screeching about a newspaper. Because, IT SHOWS UP EVERY MORNING. EVERY MORNING! AND THAT IS MIRACULOUS AND CAUSE FOR CELEBRATION. Same for the mail. We don't have a mailbox, but my in-laws do and Sam seriously thinks it's Christmas every day when he opens their mailbox and there is mail inside. (Keep in mind: his most recent memories of mail involved driving to post and going to the mail room. New house does not have its own mailbox out by the street and it's too high for him to see inside. Womp womp.)

• Some things don't change. Like Molly's ability to go to sleep with wet hair and wake up with flawless curls. I will never stop being jealous of her hair.

• Another big change- no more Paw Patrol! Well, it stays at Mom mom's house. We have no cable at our house and you know those DVDs are Mom mom's right?? Gotta stay over there. Darn. I know. It's really disappointing. (Until you consider how much I loathe kid shows, and then it seems like a pretty sweet deal that none of that stuff made it over here.)

• I had another OB appointment where no one could tell me whether I was 33 or 35 weeks. When I asked the OB (new guy I haven't met before), he sorta kinda assumed that I was asking because I wanted to deliver earlier rather than later and responded with, "Well, if you have a favorable cervical reading at 39 weeks (and WHO EVEN KNOWS WHEN THAT MAY BE), then we might give you the option to induce." Tap the brakes, buddy! Was not wanting to evict anyone. Although he did mention my history of "very large babies" and I was looking around like, who are we talking about right now? My babies have never been over 9lbs. Anything under 9 seems pretty normal to me, but then again, living in Korea felt normal to me and when I tell people that I enjoyed it, they look at me like I have three heads. So maybe I am not the best judge of normal. Either way, this baby can't stay in here forever, so I think we'll let nature take its course and do its thing. I do enjoy these maternity pants and sleeping all night.

• After returning from my OB appointment, I decided it would be a good idea to squeeze over this mountain of stuff, ignore the mountain of stuff, and play the piano instead of unpacking/cleaning said mountain and stuff. Good decision.

Bump bump bump

• That day also happened to be Love Your Lawyer Day (according to someone on facebook, and you know if it's on the internet, it's the gospel). So we made a cake for our two favorite lawyers. I'm sure they could evict us and have us thrown in prison for any number of things (the least of which was not flushing #2's on a regular basis), but they graciously hosted us in their house for a ridiculously long time without complaint.

That cake went incredibly fast.

• We drove down to Aberdeen Proving Ground in Maryland over the weekend to visit with friends and run a few errands. Sam passed out hard on the way back. Molly decided to keep us company and give her commentary on every last living thing she saw out her window.

•  The next day while running an errand, she took her very own carseat nap.

• We originally thought our plumbing in the kitchen would be hooked up on Monday, the 9th. This was a loose oral agreement between Steve and our plumber, who happens to live two doors down from us. I learned the hard way that I need to make these appointments with a hard, set date and time, or said plumber might not have room for us in his schedule. Regardless, we decided to move in that night anyway. One last meal terrorizing my in-laws, then over to our new house for baths and bed.

• It all went much better than I anticipated, minus the kids' door getting stuck and them thinking we locked them in their room. That issue hasn't been completely resolved yet, but Steve assures me that with a little wood glue and new screws, that door will be back to functioning in no time. (We've got quite a few old house probs. Still love this squeaky old place though.)

• The next morning was glorious. I walked about the house bra-free and the kids rediscovered all the toys that they haven't seen in months. Eventually they stopped asking when they were going back to live at Mom mom's house.

• First family dinner- takeout pizza! And two thumbs up from Steve.

• The plumber finally came. After a few hours of staring at his crack (I always tell Steve, we really get our money's worth out of this guy- he really gives you the full experience every time), we had a fully functional kitchen. I ran my dishwasher, washed things in my sink, and turned on the oven. Life is good again.

• Unfortunately (fortunately?), we've never had new appliances before, so turning on the oven produced a smell that we were told was normal ("burning off the protective covering") but left the house smelling like melted plastic. Pinterest to the rescue!! If you are looking to cover up any funky smells before your in-laws see your newly renovated house for the first time in months, follow this link and you too can achieve that Williams Sonoma smell in your home on the cheap. 
• We had the in-laws over for dinner (that they brought- because Martha Stewart I am not) and I am not sure if their expressions were Relief That It's Actually Over or Impressed Because We Have Damn Good Taste. I like to think it was the latter, but let's be real- 2.5 months with this circus living in your house had to produce many feelings of relief.

• The next day I received an early birthday gift from Casey, clearly my sister from another mister. I will absolutely be festively plump this year. Might even be that sort of festive all the way until Valentine's Day- who knows? I think the red works for ALL SEASONS.

• Pennsylvania was clearly primping for my mama to arrive. I woke up and said, "I think it's pink outside!" Went to the bathroom and saw this view.

• The kids were impatiently waiting for her to arrive. They did not seem to understand that we would be picking her up while they were at preschool. Eventually she did arrive, despite the rain. We immediately went for cheesesteaks and then picked the kids up from school. I did a terrible job of documenting her visit the rest of the time she was here.

• You can almost feel how few effs she gives, just from looking at this picture, yes? So hipster. So meme-worthy.

• Impatiently waiting for Hodgie to finish using the bathroom. (Note: Nothing is sacred here.) "What she DOIN'??" "Is she goin' pee pee or poo poo?" "I don't fink she comin' out." "Is she wipin'?" God forbid someone spends more than 30 seconds using the potty in this house, with the door closed at that. And if you do, expect to loudly hear about it because the person waiting outside the door has yet to learn any sort of manners regarding what is appropriate to yell about and which thoughts should remain in our heads.

• Went to Ikea. Bought all the things. Had a big time.

• There she is! Obviously leading art time. 

• The next day we went to Linvilla to pick apples. Luckily we got to go on a hayride!

• After being sufficiently covered in hay that was surely coated in some sort of super glue just to mess with us, we arrived at the pick-able apple trees.

• Obviously the weather has turned since the last time we picked apples. Some of us are more excited about that than others of us. (Hint: the gigantic pregnant lady is the happiest of all because I am finally NOT SWEATING ALL DAY LONG. Glory, glory, hallelujah.)

• Sunday morning brought church. Then Steve took the kids to run birthday errands. (Birthdays are A Really Big Deal that require a lot of prep work, you know.) 

• Mama and I took that opportunity to head into Philly and see a few tourist sights. 

•  Liberty Bell: check.

• Independence Hall: check.

• Commodore Barry: double check.

•  A few selfies with all the famous people: triple check.

• A nighttime ride into the city to see Boathouse Row all lit up. Sam was giddy to be up past bedtime. Molly passed out before we even got on the interstate.

• The next morning brought my 29th birthday. And the best meme I've received in quite some time. (Thanks, Casey!)

• Waffle cake before school!

• Steve spoiled me with multiple bouquets of flowers and I hope they continue to stay pretty all over the house!

• Molly- unimpressed birthday unicorn. Sam- can't ever cheese hard enough.

• Odie- mortified.

• My dad sent me a gorgeous bouquet and a balloon (with a string!! that's a huge bonus).

• Quality control, doing his thing.

• Ta-da! CAKE. My in-laws came over to join us and Sam volunteered to open my gifts. Such a helpful guy. They watched Despicable Me while we talked and can you tell that I've always wanted a Minions themed party? Because I have. Luckily my people know what they I like.

• While it was slightly depressing to hear that I was turning 29 when just the night prior, I 100% thought I was turning 28 (brain is operating somewhere around age 79), I am oh so grateful for the chance to have traveled another lap around the sun. Life is good and I'm so glad I was able to have my mama here to celebrate with us. I will be sure to live up my last year of my 20s (somewhere in between night feedings and the start of kindergarten, I'm sure). 

• This morning I woke up fully feeling another year older. Steve left for a fishing trip at 4:30 (yes, that would be AM) and I woke up with my eyes glued shut thanks to the gift of pink eye from the kids (they really know how to do birthday presents). The second cup of coffee didn't last too long. I passed out on the couch and thankfully my mom was around to make the kids breakfast and supervise their chaos. I appeared to have partied too hard the night before. Which is odd since I think I was in bed by 10 and slept all night and had zero alcohol. Here's to 29! I just know it will be great.